Could You Do It?

Could you give up something up you really, really like? Could you pick any time, and just do it? Not during Lent or the beginning of a new year.  Could you do it for a month just to support a friend? I often wonder if you did this, would it help you understand a bit more what I go through, everyday. 

Imagine giving up ice cream, soda or chocolate; doesn't have to be alcohol, just something you really like and crave at times of stress or want in times of celebration. 

Maybe you could understand more what it's like for someone in recovery? Would you be able to go to a birthday party and not have a single piece of cake, even with others raving about the frosting? Would you be able to not snack at all after dinner, even when the rest of your family snacks nightly before bedtime. Could you go to the movies and not get popcorn or any other snack during the movie, but sit with others munching on popcorn and soda? How about a break room full of food and being expected to be there, but not be able to have anything?   

Now imagine this as not a choice but necessary to survive and not destroy your life. Imagine what it feels like to be excluded because some friends don't know how to be around you or they don't like the sober, healthier you.  Imagine having to stay sober or not eat chocolate, expected to be around it, and act like it doesn't bother you. This is my everyday. 

This isn't meant to make anyone feel guilty or sorry for me. I'm just sharing the difficulties I face everyday, not sharing with everyone I encounter that I am in recovery, but being expected, either way, to take part in interacting with others. I want to have a choice to be around it. Let me choose when I put myself in these  scenarios, but please understand when I choose to avoid. It's not to avoid you, sometimes it's just too hard to not partake with everyone else.